Work in progress

2020 came as if I was ready for it. 20 years since the 2000s, also referred to as "few years ago". I am deeply bothered by this thought yet I am grateful for the times I currently live in, the progress we have collectively made in the world and for the fact that I did spend my youth times when there was no social media. 

The more I read and reflect about my thoughts from not too long ago (give it 2-3 years) the more I see how significantly I have changed my view on myself and on the world. Boy, was I naive! 

I guess it's a natural progression path so I cannot really "blame" myself for this. What I do want to do is to purely write down couple of reflections, or more specifically, advice to my younger self as it seems to be very popular reading nowadays. Just for me, to have them here:

- do not rush things, they will reach you one way or another: I have been so impatient for things to "happen": wanted to have boobs, wanted for that guy to like me, wanted to learn faster, wanted to grow up (the joke is on me now), wanted to become 18 to drive, wanted to have 1000 friends, wanted to love, wanted to go to university, wanted to be cool, wanted to hang out with cool people, wanted my first job, wanted a second university degree, wanted to lose weight (and never lost that wish), wanted to have x y z things, wanted to have money, wanted to travel the world, wanted to find my soulmate, wanted a solid career, wanted a family. 

What I learned is that you need to enjoy the moment, trust your instinct and trust the journey. Collect experiences rather than things.

- connected to this, just a reinforcement that things will settle down. All storms pass and the big dramas pass to. 

- stay true to yourself and your values. Be authentic rather than popular. 

- weight management is a bitch but do not worry too much. Aim for balance not perfection, stay healthy, but enjoy a little bit more and do not stress over every possible calorie. 

- invest in meaningful connections not in quantity

- embrace your flaws rather than hiding them. Be comfortable in your skin (the sooner you realize, the better)

- be courageous and not afraid to fail because you will anyway. A lot of times. This is what learning means. 

- assume your vulnerability. Do not build walls, let people see it and let them help you. 

- do not run from the pain or the sorrow. Confront it rather put it under the carpet (because they will be back to hit you when you least expect or can manage it)

- know that happiness comes from internal not from other people, not from your partner, family or friends. If you are miserable inside, none of these will help. 

- do not hold grudges, they are not worth the energy you spend for them. Do not play victim, that doesn't help either. Judge less.

- There is a time to waste time with few people and that's alright. For the rest, do not waste time as people that care about you or love you make time not excuses. Always. 

- do not be afraid to love and say it. It will suck some times, but life is short. Go for it. 

- be curious about the world and about people. Stay open, stay humble, stay kind. 

I stop here before I really turn into a wise granny; as one could notice, the older you get the easier is to reflect or use the words "reflect" and "reflections" in absolutely every sentence. 

And at the end of this little retrospective I am happy to say that I am still a work in progress, learning day by day and accepting the good, the bad and the ugly about me and about life. 

This world is watching me...